It’s 8 o’clock and my baby has been sleeping soundly since I nursed him a little past 6. In a couple of hours, he will squirm and cry in his sleep and I will be running and panting my way up the stairs to comfort him. The rest of the night will be a blur.… Continue reading The Fallacy of Postpartum Bliss
That moment, a very quiet moment, when I hold him close to me and both my arms are wrapped around him. His head is on my shoulder and his chest gently vibrates against mine. I feel his sweet breath at the side of my neck along with soft tiny arms clinging onto me. Everywhere is… Continue reading When the coffee’s cold and life is on hold
It’s been two weeks since I became a mom, and never have two weeks felt so long and so fast at the same time. I knew then that our lives would change. We had planned for, dreamed of, and prepared for this baby. But knowing and experiencing are at times as distant to each other… Continue reading Becoming a mom
The most powerful thing my body has ever done is to grow a life inside of it. No personal miracle that I have ever experienced comes close to discovering the scale of my body’s capacity: to create, transform, and nurture another life. It is a physical and emotional journey so incredibly overwhelming that I still… Continue reading What I really think about pregnancy
“Sometimes chaos is the very thing that deliberately shakes up our neatly ordered worlds in order to get us out of the neatly ordered ruts that have kept us stuck,” says Craig Lounsbrough. I just stumbled into a place commonly called a limbo. There are three big things that may have brought me here: becoming… Continue reading When being lost is okay
Dear Baby Willey, Currently, you’ve been in my tummy for 18 weeks. My app says you’re as big as a sweet potato, about 5.5 inches and 5 ounces. Another app says you’re the size of a croissant, and I’m imagining how your little face is reacting to the size references these pregnancy apps are giving… Continue reading To our baby inside me
We were biking along the streets of Luang Prabang, Laos. It was a December morning and another particularly chilly day (for my tropical standards). The streets were quiet---almost meditative. We stopped at a neighborhood pharmacy, parked our vintage Japanese bikes on the curb, and navigated our way into asking the middle-aged Laotian proprietress for a… Continue reading Really, we’re pregnant?